Daphne shares her reflections: Honest Conversations Conference
Daphne, on behalf of Project Esther, attended and presented at the "Sexual Abuse in the Church: Honest Conversations" Conference. She shares some of her reflections.
The Royal Commission looked into what happened to tamariki, rangatahi and adults in State and faith-based care in Aotearoa New Zealand between the years 1950-99 (for more).
In 2018 a politician, in a radio interview, was of the view that there was “No need for a historical enquiry” and that “The ground has been covered.” However, in contrast, Inquiry Chair Coral Shaw stated: “The scale of abuse is beyond what anyone had ever imagined at the start of this inquiry.”
At the conference various topics were covered by speakers. These included: an overview of the Commission Interim Report, responses from the Methodist and Anglican Churches, trauma, care, findings from The Identify Survey, and the sharing of a toolkit for churches accompanying survivors. This tool kit is edited by Emily Colgan and Caroline Blyth and can be found here: "Accompanying Survivors of Sexual Harm: A toolkit for Churches".
My presentation included these thoughts: “As we listen and take note of the stories in the Royal Commission of Inquiry - Abuse in Care, the NZ Church is invited to ask some questions about Christian male power and entitlement, about the value of women and girls and children, and about sexual violence. There is evidence in their stories of myths, theological beliefs, church systems, and practices which have enabled abuse, attributed blame, and silenced women and children as victims.
As church communities we are also being invited to ask deeper questions about the nature of leadership, its valued theories, structures, and practices, about who has rights, or power, and its vulnerabilities around the potential to engage in exploitation of the weakness or vulnerability of others. As writer Ruth Everhart puts it: “The price of patriarchy is sexual abuse, and people who love Jesus should no longer be willing that anyone should pay that price. The church has been too slow to connect the assumptions of patriarchy with the realities of sexual abuse." [1]
Trauma and recovery author Judith Herman, says: "It is very tempting to take the side of the perpetrator. All the perpetrator asks is that the bystander do nothing. He appeals to the universal desire to see, hear, and speak no evil. The victim, on the contrary, asks the bystander to share the burden of pain. The victim demands action, engagement and remembering." [2]
We look forward to the Commission's report soon to be released and the recommendations and expectations of better accountability, especially in church contexts of care and most importantly, justice for victims.
[1] Everhart, R., & Gallagher, R. (2020). The #metoo reckoning: Facing the church's complicity in sexual abuse and misconduct. Blackstone Publishing., 8.
[2]Judith Lewis Herman. (1992), Trauma and Recovery. Basic Books, 7-8, as cited in Everhart, The #MeToo Reckoning.